Syfy/The Asylum, USA, 2011
Director: Mary Lambert
Writer: Naomi L. Selfman
Cast: Tiffany, Debbie Gibson, A Martinez, Kathryn Joosten, Kevin M. Horton, Carey Van Dyke, Micky Dolenz, Robert R. Shafer, Carl Ciarfalio, Steve Hart, Kaiwi Lyman, Patrick Hancock, Arden Cho, Chris Neville, Kristen Wilson, Jack Nathan Harding, Angelica Acedo, David Bantly, Kimberly Bishop, Harmony Blossom, Colleen Bosler, Jay Beyers, Clint Brink, Eddie Caldwell, Ashley Carr, Mo Caudell, Antonio D. Charity, Kate Charceston, Lauren Kim, David Chick , Robert Chu, Jenifer Cononico, Kenny Cooper, Jo Jo Crown, Candice Cunningham, Frank Lyon, Michael Dixon, Jeff DuJardin, Kim Farris, Andy Finan, Vicki Finan, Taryn T. Francis, Myron Fulton, David L. Garber, Enid Garber, Howard Gibson, Peter Grimaldo, Suzanne Gutierrez, Song Hanz, Jon Henderson, John F. Henry II, Daniel Hepner, Kylan James, Justin Jones, Mark Kivisto, Rachel Lary, Ryan Latour, Banen, Armonn Livingston, Scott Mannschreck, Lucy Mattos, Roxanna Medina, Henry Miller, Khin Myint, Cindy Newland, Derric J. Nugent, Cassandra Peca, Isabel Perez, Danielle Phelan, Antonio Quinn, Lauren Rideau, Renee Riess, Elma Rogers, Gabriella Volquartz, Peter Trenholm Smith, Vanessa Claire Stewart, Craig Stansfield, Archie Tullos ,Joseph Vega, April Wahlin, Carlo, Meredith Zerda, Valerie K. Garcia, Gregory Paul Smith, Timothy E. Goodwin, Gil Harris, Vincent De Paul, Sarah Belger, Coby Bird, Nick Bird, Thomas J. Clark, Deanna DeLisle, Jay Gillespie, Joseph Kintzer, Bob Merrick, Andrew Senita, Jennifer Skiffington, Douglas Smith, January Welsh, John Escobedo Jr., Nathan Krosley, Gary Colón, Kristen Erdogan, Erin Kolpek, Abbey Lerman, Nadejda Klein, Eric Scott Cooper, Roxy Gannon, Michael Gaglio, Angela Landis, Joseph Martinez, Ken Anthony II, Cash Flagg Jr., Mc Jones, Travis Seaborn, Christian Villarreal, Marissa Welsh
Dr. Nikki Riley and her group of animal rights activists break in to a private house and steal a number of pythons which they set free in the Everglades. There aren’t really any natural enemies to the snakes and they start to grow into extreme sizes. Eventually they start to attack alligators and kills 72 of them over a weekend. The decline in alligators make Park Ranger Terry O’Hara stop all alligator hunting permits. This upsetts the local hunters, but when she finds out giant snakes are the cause of the decline, she issues hunting permits for pythons instead. Dr. Riley isn’t happy and she and her group rally ouside the Park Ranger office.
Before the hunting expedition leaves one of the rangers instructs them on how to cut the snakes heads off and stresses the fact that they have to crush the heads after cutting them off, since they can stay alive up to an hour after being separated from the body. This information could have come in handy later on in the movie if everybody had listened. The snakehunters manages to kill some of the big pythons, but the pythons strike back and several of the hunters are killed. Among them Terry’s fiancee justin. Terry vows to avenge his death, and to get rid of all the snakes she figuers bigger alligators would tip the scale. Together with a co-ranger she in secret starts to inject dead chickens with anabolic steroids, and feed them to the alligators. Her plan seems to work since the alligators are getting bigger and the pythons are getting fewer. Terry doesn’t know that Nikki and her group has put up cameras all over the place and has managed to film Terry feeding the gators.
Six months later Terry is planning a fund raiser to help preserv wildlife. Dr. Diego Ortiz asks her to cancel the fund raiser. He has witnessed a huge python and an even bigger alligator fight each other and he realises there is a war between the two gigantic species. He wants to call in the National Guard before things get even worse. Terry refuses to listen and goes ahead with the fund raiser. Diego finds hundreds of alligator eggs 30 times their normal size. He blows them up with dynamite, but later he finds a cave where there are thousands more. Nikki and her group discovers a python skeleton the size of a train and get attacked by an alligator big as a house. She realises why Terry was feeding the gators and what she has done, so she heads for the fund raiser to confront her. Terry and Nikki gets into a catfight nockin glasses, chairs and tables over. They fight all over the place and end up in the river. During their figt Diego has tried to call them to get them to evacuate. The alligators and the pythons has stopped fighting and are on their way to town and the fund raiser together. Finally Terry and Nikki realise they have to stop fighting and work together if they are gonna be able to stop the reptiles from getting all the way to Miami.
Mega Python vs. Gatoroid is rather silly really, but I suppose nobody expects any Oscar nominations from The Asylum or SyFy. If You take it for what it is, it is entertaining at least. I thought it was fun, but it won’t make my top 10 list. Probably not even my top 100. If You never saw a snake eat a train this film is for You.
My verdict: 4 out of 10.